Sometimes it can be hard to tell people things. This can be for many many reasons. The main reason for me is that I do not want to cause offence. This of course does not always work in my favour and I have also noticed that other people have not spared my feelings when talking to me. They tell me their wise but harsh words are coming from a place of love. It feels like a double edged sword – while at times I appreciate the message sometimes the delivery can make you wonder about the other persons sense of compassion.
It also makes me wonder if there is sometime intrinsically wrong with me. I never talk to people in the way that they talk to me. In my mind, when I reflect on the way that people have spoken to me I might counter that that is the way that one might speak to a child. This irks me. This also makes me feel like there is something intrinsically wrong with me.
I actually don’t think there is. However I do think I probably need to change both who I allow myself to mix and interact with and the boundaries that I set within that interaction. At the moment there are some people / situations that are starting to become a little too toxic. I think this is partly due to my lack of boundaries in these relationships. I have not drawn the line that people cannot cross. Correction – I have drawn it but I have not made it clear to other people so they trample, stomp and criss cross over it unbeknownst to them. In the meantime – I am left bewildered and confused.