So having promised myself not to take pictures of food – I broke my resolution on 1st February 2016. I drove 20 miles to see my friend who cooked this delicious lunch for me and it looked so pretty!
I have decided to not take it all too seriously because life is perhaps too short to worry about these things. The important thing was that I have a friend who values my company and time. We laughed, caught up on old times and thought about what the future might hold. This woman has been my friend for over 10 years now and she knows me very well now – sometimes even better than I know myself. She has supported me through one the most stressful and difficult times of my life. She seems to tolerate my occasional odd behaviours including a penchant for taking pictures of food.
I, on the other hand need to be better at being a friend. Events of the past few years has had me being more supported than supportive. It feels as though all my emotional intelligence – the little that there was – was drained away. It feels like I have been emotionally illiterate and bankrupt for sometime but I think now that I have this insight I can work on myself. I guess this is all part of me reflecting on my life and my attitudes because I am 40 this year. It’s like an emotional landmark. I always used to joke that inside I always felt like I was 15 years old – however old I was. Now, while I might not want to look 40, I would still like to appear wise – like I have 40 years of life experience under my belt (yes – I can here you laughing in the background).
Lunch with my friend reminded me of normal life. Something that I feel has eluded me for some time. Occasionally I can pull it out of the bag and make something special for my friends but this has been few and far between. It always feels like my head is in a whirlpool and there is no time to think and plan. I am going to have to learn to slow down and appreciate people and life.